wonka’s “a world of your own” hits different
recently, during my flight to and from 2d con (which was great, by the way! i’ll write about that soon), i watched wonka (2023). as a person who thinks of themselves as an indie game developer who wants to make games that connect with people, the movie really hits me different in a way i don’t think it would for most people.
spoilers below the cut:
in particular, A World of Your Own, has a different reading for me. I’ll quote some of the relevant lyrics below:
Close your eyes and count to ten
Make a wish, now open them
Here’s a store that’s like no other
If it were, I wouldn’t bother[…]
A world of your own
A place to escape to
A world of your own
Where you can be free
Wherever you go
Wherevеr life takes you
This is your home
A world of your own
i think for most people, this would read like wonka trying to express how unique and awesome his chocolate is. his chocolate can literally transport you to a new world of culinary and magical possibilities. but that’s not how it reads for me. it’s true that i want to make unique and awesome games and that games can transport people to another imaginary world, but it’s more than just that.
when i make games, i want to connect with people. i want to make people, wherever and whenever they are, feel seen and understood and more connected to each other. of course, whether or not i can actually accomplish this is uncertain (though this seemed to have worked out with Gender Dysphoria). but at least to me, just like one of the last scenes in the movie, genuinely sharing what i make with others is what makes my creative work special. i don’t make games just for me. i make them to share.
and it’s rare that i can really relate to a piece of media about how i feel about making things. especially one that has such a relatable character: wonka. like me, he is naive. he could be having a much easier time if he would just compromise on his values and aspirations, or even just give up on making chocolate entirely.
for example, i’m sick of how games are marketed. i don’t want to just cold-call people or learn the meta of how to do marketing, because i want to have meaningful connections. so that means i do stuff like try to actually participate in the communities of streamers i want to have play my game. i don’t try to actively pull people in to play my game when i show up at conventions. i wrote a heartfelt letter for the physical copy of Gender Dysphoria. are these strategies effective? probably not.
but i don’t just want to make games that i would want to play, i don’t just want to make games that other people want to buy, and i don’t just want to make people entertained and happy. i don’t want to just be another game developer. i want to be like no other.